This topic has been swirling around in my head for quite some time. I’ve been reading stories lately on my Facebook page that fall into this category in so many ways. News stories, videos, memes, websites all dedicated to focusing on what people are wearing. And I’m not talking about celebrities and the “who wore it better, what are you wearing” type of thing either. I am talking about the disgusting side. There is the mundane “People of Wal-Mart” to the news articles about rape victims being blamed for wearing “slutty clothes”.
Let us start with the people of Wal-Mart. I am not saying I am a saint, I’ve laughed a few times when this comes across my news feed. But what I am really doing is laughing at someone. Plain and simple. I am degrading and judging a human being with feelings, aspirations, complex thoughts, and feelings. These are people, not funny looking dolls, or clowns that dress for the sole purpose to make us laugh. These people got out of bed this morning and probably put on the only clean outfit they could find because laundry is piling up while they are taking care of their children and working two or three jobs. That isn’t funny. I am making a vow to stop.
Secondly, I came across an article from a friend about an open letter from one SEC football fan to other SEC football fans. It went something like this: he was in the visiting town, dressed in his school colors. They were harassed to the point of having drinks thrown on them and being spat on..for TWO days. All because of what they were wearing. The two women in the group felt so unsafe, they changed. They felt threatened walking down the street! They changed out of the clothes they were proud to wear because of others. Those kids were there wearing the school colors of an institution they were proud to be associated with and proud to cheer on that weekend. And they were treated like animals. Pretty sick, right? Well, a gentleman commented that they should have had better sense than to go to a rival town wearing the wrong colors. Uh, hello? The teams were playing each other. You don’t expect the rival team’s fans to come to town? How big is that damn stadium? I am sure the school has no problem with them being there since it is a ticket sold and the money goes to the athletic program? And we all know how much $$$ SEC football brings in. If visiting fans did NOT attend games, that’s a huge dent in the income.
Then there is the news article of the guy who likes to dress in skirts. That is his decision. He feels comfortable in them. He likes them. When he walks down the city street for three hours one day, he records how many times he is called a “faggot”. Let me ask you this, what business is it of yours what someone else wears? Does it affect you? Does it affect your bank account, your religious beliefs, your social standing among your friends, your job? How does it make your life more difficult? Right. It doesn’t. Mind your own F@#$%^&* business. That guy likes to wear clothes that make him feel good. Not you. He buys his own clothes. Not you. Keep your mouth shut. He gets up everyday with goals, friends, family, a job, errands, and FEELINGS. He is a human being WHO FEELS, and you are summing up his entire existence with one word that doesn’t begin to show you the layers he has to his life. He isn’t a “faggot” but you are an asshole.
Lastly, and the most egregious is what we call “victim blaming”. You know what it is. When a woman is raped, the first things that comes from peoples’ mouths is “she shouldn’t have been wearing that shirt skirt.” Really? A piece of cotton/polyester made that man suddenly turn into a violent criminal? Maybe that is why fabric blends are an abomination in Leviticus.
In all of these instances, bad behavior is blamed on the victim. They shouldn’t have worn that. They were asking for it. Oh, that is my favorite phrase (note the sarcasm). None of these people asked for it unless they turned around to their attacker and actually ASKED FOR IT. Which we are smart enough to know, that didn’t and doesn’t happen. Feel me?
Wearing clothes you enjoy, feel good in, and love should not get you laughed at, harassed, catcalled, attacked, or raped…
The attackers, catcallers, harassers and rapists should take responsibility for their own actions. First, its none of your business what another person decides to walk out of their home wearing. Secondly, clothes don’t give a human soul its value and worth. Clothes don’t show you what is inside another person. Clothes do not display outwardly, what someone feels, thinks, loves, enjoys, cares for, fights for, etc. Stop being an asshole, and look past the clothes. “Clothes do not make the man…”